[Cindy_17]

Chrissy, I too am new to the site and I am still trying to learn it all too, lol. Thank you so much for your kind words. When I read your post I could relate oh so well. The first several days when Jingle passed I didn't even get out of bed. I too lost weight, couldn't eat and couldn't sleep. The pain was like a knife in my chest, devastation does not even begin to explain it. Jingle was my loud one and Holly was the quiet little girl, I honestly didn't realize how loud Jingle could be until he wasn't here and the silence was deafening. I cuddled extra tight to Holly, still do, her heart was broke and she was lost. Jingle was by far the alpha and she was happy to be his little follower, she didn't know what to do. Jingle was tragically hit by a car, not run over, just "bumped". My husband let him outside in the backyard, literally turned around to grab his phone off the end table beside the door he let him out, Jingle chased a squirrel out of the fence and got hit. It was around 9am Jan 15, the vet said it was instant but I still live the nightmare of it. My husband had to wake me to tell me what had happened. The whole thing is surreal, Holly is the one that would get up with my husband on lazy Saturday's, and Jingle would stay in the bed with me. If I could just live that day over again....Jingle was my side kick, my precious blessing, it is still hard. I'm not so sure you ever get over it, I think it is more you get use to it. Not a day goes by that he is not on my mind, I walk in my bedroom and expect to see those beautiful ears sticking up from behind the pillows where he loved to lay. Presley has made 100% difference in Holly's life. To begin with she was not to keen on Presley, he is a rough and tough little boy, but so full of energy and love. He would walk up to Holly lick her right in the face and take off running wanting her to chase him, lol his persistence paid off, she now plays with Presely all the time, he has made the biggest difference in her and in me. I still love Jingle with everything I have, couldn't imagine loving another one like that, then came Presley. It was important to me that Presley not have the same coloring as Jingle, so Presely is darker. Presley walked right in and took over my heart, our home, and Holly's happiness. While there are similarities in Jingle and Presley, there are pronounced differences too, I can honestly say I couldn't love Presley anymore than I do and he rescued Holly and me from a dark place. Your Baxter was very well loved, without a doubt he knew that very much! I do hurt for you, the pain is just unbearable at times, Jingle was only 7, he did have pancreas issues but so full of life. Kaylee is a special little girl too, they do require extra love and attention when tragedy strikes. Have you tried boiled chicken for Kaylee? I understand switching vets, since Jingle passed and the one day I went to the grocery store I have not left Holly by herself at all. I am way overprotective now, I look for anything that can happen, and Presley looks for anything he can get into, so he keeps me on my toes and keeps me laughing. All fur babies are special, but there is just something about a Yorkie, Jingle had me wrapped from the first time I seen him, and he knew it. Presley cannot fill Jingles "shoes" nor would I want him to, because there is not one that could fill Presley's either. Try not to close off the idea of a new baby, it may just be the medicine you and Kaylee needs. Baxter loved you and was devoted sweet baby, he is still with you in your heart and he is waiting with my Jingle to greet us when we enter those gates. Know he isn't hurting, and know that he is happy all the time now, I do hope this brings you peace, it is so difficult to find it at a time like this. Remember as well that God will not put more on you than you can handle even though at times it feels like we are right on the edge. Bless you and yours!!