Oh how I understand what you are going through.That empty feeling is the worse thing to go through.Try to think of the happy times you had with your baby.I just lost my eclectus parrot of 27 years on March 5 and I get mad at myself with the what if I did this.The hard part was the vet did not listen to my concerns and I think he held her too tight.She died right there but I try to think of the happy days I had with her.Hope you feel better and hugs to you take a day at a time.Susan |