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Originally Posted by ytsirk27 he once said he'd stalk me if I left and the guy that i was with would be sorry!!!!!!!!   |
I know how you feel. When I was 15 I dated a guy until I was 18 who was controlling like that. He wasn't physically abusive, but he had his ways. I hated alot of things about him. He was VERY emotional.Once we were sitting down to eat chinese food and his finger got burnt, he freaked out and started screaming and he threw the food on me burning me too. I don't know if it was an accident or whatever, but he always overreacted. He would cry all the time over stupid stuff. He might have even had a mental problem or something. It was like everything was all about his feelings. Everytime I tried to break up with him he said he would kill himself. I realized that I was only sticking around because I didn't want him to hurt himself. I didn't know any better, he had moved 2 states away to be with me so he made me feel guilty about that. But fact was that I didn't want to be with him anymore. I finally said that I needed some space and got some of my things. 3 days later I called for something and some other chick picked up the phone at our apartment. I went there later while he was at work and got the rest of my things and left, never seeing him again. But my sister did see him and his new gf a month later in the next town. The new girlfriend probably thought it was weird seeing a huge pregnant woman yelling at him.
I hated being stuck in that relationship. But I am still glad that it happened because I wouldn't know what to look for in a person. I really appreciate the qualities in my husband. I am happy that he's nothing like the crazy guy I dated in high school. I feel like my husband is my match and is so much like me.
If your heart isn't in it and you are only sticking around because he's controlling you, then I recommend that you seek some kind of counseling at least to improve yourself and try to live somewhere else. If you have to, get a temporary restraining order if he doesn't leave when you ask him to. You need to explain to him that he can not tell you to come back out of guilt, you have to come back because you want to. If you come back then it was meant to be. You need to explain to him that he is being controlling by saying that he's going to kill himself and he is using the kids to his advantage. If you decide to leave, the first few months are always the most difficult. Good luck in whatever you decide to do.