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Originally Posted by lynzy420  Hyper Vigilance Is exactly what Ann said and more...I'm sure that different people experience similar "symptoms" (cuz there is only so many possibilities) but to what degree each symptom is for individuals most likely varies.
Someone like me can read people and like Ann said "even when you don't want to"....I can tell you so much about a person seconds or sometimes minutes after meeting them...worse I can spot a bad person in a room full of people who think said bad person is wonderful! Its being alert to almost everything so much to the point that it is part of our personalities...not something we want but something we can't help and can't live without! Ex: In my "old" house I knew every sound that was in it, from which sink was running, to the settling of the load bearing wall in the living room, the dryer, the washer etc., now I wouldn't spend a second *thinking* about those noises...but the second a new noise entered, or an old noise changed I would instantly recognize it! So if the dryer suddenly was making a different sound, I would know immediately so sometimes its a good thing! I am having a very difficult time with the new house and adjusting to the sounds...they startle me! Also, if the TV is too loud I have to turn it down if its drowning out all the normal sounds around me...sounds crazy but its not...There are so many things but one of the funny ones and yet not so funny is example: I am walking through the parking ramp there is someone coming toward me, I'm unconsciously reading his body language taking inventory of everything about him...again its not paranoia your just doing it without realizing it, suddenly he is 2 feet in front of you and then suddenly says HI and startles the shiz right out of me cuz I was zoned out on studying the stranger! I literally jump and then immediately say "hello, I'm sorry I was lost in my thoughts" Its a reflex now! I can go on and on with all the symptoms, if you want more info pm me.
BTW...peace for me is listening to the stereo full blast and getting lost in the music!!! |
Girl, exactly. And btw, I have a terrible startle reflex too! It's annoying. But most people w/ PTSD or hypervig or former trauma sufferers have it. I always wonder why it won't go away, when I've already dealt w/ so much of the yukky stuff. Bleh.
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Originally Posted by msyorktown My ex was diagnosed with clinical depression....it wasn't easy living with him at all. He would go from one extreme to the other...from laughing an joking around, to this nasty mean,derogatory person I didn't know. It didn't help that he was on meds, and drank excessively...the minute he became violent, I was gone! As some of you know I am a domestic abuse survivor...so there was no way I was going down that road again. It wasn't me he abused, it was my son. No, nope ....thankfully I didn't kill him and wind up in jail with no one to protect my son...my son stopped me with the words 'please mommy, I still need you' dropped the knife and called the police, who then escorted him out of my house!
I had no idea such a thing existed until it slapped me in the face, what a rude awakening...I hope for a better tomorrow for all who suffer some form of depression, anxiety, PTSD etc...
I went into a deep funk after the marriage ended, the hardest thing I ever had to do was seek help, bc I was raised to pick yourself up and keep going....well I couldn't keep going, I was sinking fast, my kids were suffering for it...mom was functioning but wasn't there, at least not the way they remembered mommy always being there.
My kids were my motivation to seek help ....went into therapy and returned to prayer...here I am today.
My first therapist wanted to put me on Prozac...my bff begged me not to take it...she is a psychiatric nurse....I took her advice and changed therapists, all the better for it. |
You have a ton of courage, my friend!!! I'm so glad you found a way out of such a painful relationship, bc not all people can find that way out. I can't even imagine the fear and pain of spousal / partner abuse
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Therapy is amazing, isn't it? With the right therapist (which can be very hard to find, like a needle in a haystack), you can really work through a ton of stuff, and develop coping mechanisms that can work no matter what comes up to haunt you later.
Glad you are healed / healing
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