I agree with much Gontygirl says. Especially the NO BARK. It has worked well for Sophie. We only raise our voice with this one command so she knows we mean it. Unfortunately I used "the tone" once while our one year old granddaughter was here and it really scared her. Now we are somewhat hostages with our tone while she is visiting
.
I have to somewhat disagree however with your logic regarding our Sophie's "feelings". I swear she has them
. I have seen her slink under the bed when she seems to have hurt feeling or when seemly embarrassed. She often reacts to certain situations as a young child would. Maybe I am projecting and maybe it makes no sense at all but my intuition tells me she feels more than one may think.