[gemy]

Ummm... How intelligent is this woman? Does she usually make quips, the office bon vivant? Where I am going with my ruminations is/was this some sort of deliberate ploy or play, to create a situation of difficulty for you? If you believe this to be true, then carefully weigh your decisions. IN my experience which at one time was a lot in the business world, this kind of comment would never have been expressed in a "formal" business meeting. How-ever this was years ago, and mayhap office policy etc has changed.

Now you've already approached HR, they have given you a response, and you are to meet on the Monday. Think carefully on how and what you want to say. In fact script it out. I'm not saying to be untruthful, but to present the truth in as clear and factual a manner as possible. You already know HR thinks it was a joke and on the outside looking in, I certainly can see how this could be so. How-ever in your explanation of the sequencing of events; and I am assuming you expressed aloud in the meeting that your Nana died in the winter, you were very close etc; that if indeed expressed to the group at large, should have indicated her death is one that you are still mourning. And given that understanding, any jokes on her behaviour or heaven forfend her death, would have been incredibly offensive.

You do know exactly what transpired at that meeting. We don't.

My point is to tread carefully, most especially if you think this trouble maker has a specific agenda against you.

You may need to re-think resigning from both committees. There maybe good, practical value for your career to continue to be a member of one or both.