Ok, enough joking around.
If you wanna do something easy that will keep, and needs no reheating, try coctiel de camarron, Mexican shrimp cocktail, one of my fave things ever and low fat!
Shrimp, medium to large, peeled, deviened, cooked
avocados, diced in small cubes
tomatoes, dices as well
onion, diced as well (I use sweet onion)
cilantro (yuck, I hate cilantro, so I use green onion for the color)
chopped jalepenos
lemon or lime juice
tomato paste or ketchup
water
salt
pepper
cumin (I put this in just bc I love cumin, don't think it's traditionally in there)
Everything is according to your taste, so if it doesn't taste good it's not my fault
Mix everything except the shrimp. If you put the cooked shrimp in the salsa, it will overcook the shrimp by the time you serve it. Keep the shrimp separate until serving time.