I am so sorry for the loss of your friend. (((hug)))
As for the rest...I just want to say "You can do it!!!!" I too struggle with the same thing and the same feelings. It is a true battle. I think getting into the dance exercise is a great idea for you. Good luck!!
You can request that this thread be closed if you'd like. Just hit the "report" triangle and say you want it closed. I don't think they can delete it, but you can ask.
