I have never had to bring one of my dogs to be put to sleep. I have had to have two cats put to sleep, I was not with one, and I regret it to this day. Megan was only 5, she had asthma and prednisone was no longer working, nebulizer treatments were not helping and she was suffering. I was not strong enough to be with her, I stayed in the car sobbing while my (now ex)husband took her in to the vet's office. She was my baby, I hand raised her from the time she was 10 days old and was brought into the shelter because her mama had died. I should have been there, I should have held her, I should have been telling her that I loved her as she left this world. It was selfish of me. I have terrible guilt about this, I am in tears now, and am having a hard time typing these words.
When my parents cat Bacardi, who was my pet as a teen and young adult, became old and sickly and it was his time to go, I made sure that I went with my mother. I stayed with him, I did what I wished that I had done for Megan. As hard as it was for me, it was better for him to be with his family and to fel our love. I know exactly how he died, and I know it was peaceful, and I don't have to wonder or wish that I had done thing differently.
And I will make sure that I am always with my babies in the when their time comes, they will not be alone with strangers, and I will tell them that they will always be loved.
__________________ Melissa and Belle  |