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iloverufus · 04-10-2011, 09:05 PM

i stumbled upon this site when looking for yorkie breeders and decided to join in the hopes that others might know what i'm going through. my guy rufus was diagnosed with prostate cancer on 5/27/2010 and the doctor gave him 7-12 months and sadly that time is fast approaching. he begun having trouble walking, unable to put weight on one of his back legs and is always holding it up. we took him to our local vet who now said his prostate is greatly enlarged. he is going to his oncologist on thursday and we are prepared to hear it is his time. whether she says it or not, we know it is. he needs to wear a diaper in the day because he leaks pee and and within the last month or two he needs to wear a diaper at night bc liquid and feces come from him uncontrollably. i had a long talk with him last week and i finally understood that this is no longer the dog i spent the last 8 years with. he's a shell. he is just tired. knowing this doesn't make it any easier. he has been at points the only friend i had and my biggest worry is i will not love another yorkie. all i know is he will not be here come may and watching these days go down is the biggest heartbreak i've ever experienced. greater than the loss of my grandmother who actually died ON my birthday. that being bc her death was the most unexpected thing that could've happened and i had to deal with it at THAT moment. i couldn't go back. i didn't have any clue. this time is different bc i've seen this dog almost every day for 8 years since i was 14 and i've watched him go downhill the last 11 months. i dont mean to push my belief in god, but even as someone who's not an avid church-goer, but still a believer i asked god to give me a few things: strength, rufus' 8th birthday and if it was in the cards, give me his 8th anniversary with us which was march 15th. rufus was born on january 3rd. he gave me the strength but its fading as time comes closer, and he gave me the other two. thats all i asked for. not a cure or a miracle bc i accepted that wasn't going to happen. i don't feel guilty at THIS point, idk how i'll feel when it's over, but i feel such sadness and heartache, and i just want rufus to know i WILL be okay and i want to make him proud of me. thanks for listening.

04-10-2011, 09:05 PM	#1
iloverufus Yorkie Talker Join Date: Apr 2011 Location: marlton, nj Posts: 10	only a few weeks left with my lil boy i stumbled upon this site when looking for yorkie breeders and decided to join in the hopes that others might know what i'm going through. my guy rufus was diagnosed with prostate cancer on 5/27/2010 and the doctor gave him 7-12 months and sadly that time is fast approaching. he begun having trouble walking, unable to put weight on one of his back legs and is always holding it up. we took him to our local vet who now said his prostate is greatly enlarged. he is going to his oncologist on thursday and we are prepared to hear it is his time. whether she says it or not, we know it is. he needs to wear a diaper in the day because he leaks pee and and within the last month or two he needs to wear a diaper at night bc liquid and feces come from him uncontrollably. i had a long talk with him last week and i finally understood that this is no longer the dog i spent the last 8 years with. he's a shell. he is just tired. knowing this doesn't make it any easier. he has been at points the only friend i had and my biggest worry is i will not love another yorkie. all i know is he will not be here come may and watching these days go down is the biggest heartbreak i've ever experienced. greater than the loss of my grandmother who actually died ON my birthday. that being bc her death was the most unexpected thing that could've happened and i had to deal with it at THAT moment. i couldn't go back. i didn't have any clue. this time is different bc i've seen this dog almost every day for 8 years since i was 14 and i've watched him go downhill the last 11 months. i dont mean to push my belief in god, but even as someone who's not an avid church-goer, but still a believer i asked god to give me a few things: strength, rufus' 8th birthday and if it was in the cards, give me his 8th anniversary with us which was march 15th. rufus was born on january 3rd. he gave me the strength but its fading as time comes closer, and he gave me the other two. thats all i asked for. not a cure or a miracle bc i accepted that wasn't going to happen. i don't feel guilty at THIS point, idk how i'll feel when it's over, but i feel such sadness and heartache, and i just want rufus to know i WILL be okay and i want to make him proud of me. thanks for listening.