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SnowWa · 11-23-2005, 01:46 PM

Drakes Mom - I just ran across your post.

Two months ago, I put a little dog to sleep. She was 9 years old and was the love of my life. I missed nearly two weeks of work. I tried going to work, but cried all the way to work, at work, and all the way home. My heart was broken, and I thought I would never get over it.

I still remember the first day that I didn't cry, but, of course, I cried again the next day.

I know exactly how you feel. My daughter finally sat me down and told me that I just had to get over it. She said, "I know how you feel, but people are only going to put up with this for so long and are going to think you are nuts."
We laughed a little - but she was right. And, I have recovered from the intense grief. But I still never think about "Dutchess" without tearing up and wishing I had her back.

Don't beat yourself up with guilt. I have experienced a lot of guilt too because my little dog had a back problem and could have had surgery. It would have cost around $5000, and I would also have had to miss a lot of work. Dutchess was 9 years old, and she had diabetes (which was no problem other than giving her two insulin shots a day). She had had some other medical problems, which were completely resolved, but which had cost me nearly $2000 the preceding year. I just felt overwhelmed with her pain, her diabetes, her age, and all the medical bills.

On the way home after putting her to sleep, I felt that I had made the worst mistake I'd ever made in my life. I wished I had remortgaged my house and spent whatever it took to keep her.

My guilt is also lessening as time goes by. Thank God!

I understand what you have been going through and hope that you are starting to feel better.

Carol Jean

PS: I shouldn't say this - I really shouldn't -- because I know it was done with a good heart, but that "Rainbow Bridge" stuff really got to me after a while. First of all, there isn't a Rainbow Bridge - it's just something someone made up --and everyone has been using it every since. I felt it was almost an insult to my intelligence - and certainly it was nothing that would make me feel better after losing my little dog. Someone even told me that the "little dog fairy" would come and take my dog and keep her safe until I could be with her again. If someone had said, "Maybe dogs go to heaven and maybe you see her again." That - I could hope for.

The "Rainbow Bridge" and the little "Dog Fairy" really weren't things that helped me through my pain. I needed to hear from people who had gone through a similar experience, who knew how I felt, and who had somehow survived. I needed understanding and knowing that I would not feel so much pain forever.

Again, I hope you are feeling better. They say "time heals" and thank God, it really does.

11-23-2005, 01:46 PM	#35
SnowWa YT 2000 Club Member Join Date: Nov 2005 Location: USA Posts: 2,992	Drakes Mom - I just ran across your post. Two months ago, I put a little dog to sleep. She was 9 years old and was the love of my life. I missed nearly two weeks of work. I tried going to work, but cried all the way to work, at work, and all the way home. My heart was broken, and I thought I would never get over it. I still remember the first day that I didn't cry, but, of course, I cried again the next day. I know exactly how you feel. My daughter finally sat me down and told me that I just had to get over it. She said, "I know how you feel, but people are only going to put up with this for so long and are going to think you are nuts." We laughed a little - but she was right. And, I have recovered from the intense grief. But I still never think about "Dutchess" without tearing up and wishing I had her back. Don't beat yourself up with guilt. I have experienced a lot of guilt too because my little dog had a back problem and could have had surgery. It would have cost around $5000, and I would also have had to miss a lot of work. Dutchess was 9 years old, and she had diabetes (which was no problem other than giving her two insulin shots a day). She had had some other medical problems, which were completely resolved, but which had cost me nearly $2000 the preceding year. I just felt overwhelmed with her pain, her diabetes, her age, and all the medical bills. On the way home after putting her to sleep, I felt that I had made the worst mistake I'd ever made in my life. I wished I had remortgaged my house and spent whatever it took to keep her. My guilt is also lessening as time goes by. Thank God! I understand what you have been going through and hope that you are starting to feel better. Carol Jean PS: I shouldn't say this - I really shouldn't -- because I know it was done with a good heart, but that "Rainbow Bridge" stuff really got to me after a while. First of all, there isn't a Rainbow Bridge - it's just something someone made up --and everyone has been using it every since. I felt it was almost an insult to my intelligence - and certainly it was nothing that would make me feel better after losing my little dog. Someone even told me that the "little dog fairy" would come and take my dog and keep her safe until I could be with her again. If someone had said, "Maybe dogs go to heaven and maybe you see her again." That - I could hope for. The "Rainbow Bridge" and the little "Dog Fairy" really weren't things that helped me through my pain. I needed to hear from people who had gone through a similar experience, who knew how I felt, and who had somehow survived. I needed understanding and knowing that I would not feel so much pain forever. Again, I hope you are feeling better. They say "time heals" and thank God, it really does.