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Originally Posted by lovespandp  You know I wasn't trying to be a jerk, or have it come off in a bad way, I just have seen people come in and say that want to declaw their cat and have the vet just say ok..and not try to tell them all the other options that there are..I just try to let people know what the vet doesn't always say. I know a lot of hospital's wont do that anymore..from what I have read so who knows. to each his own and if they want to do that then thats on them, me personaly would never do it. My Mom thought about doing it to her 2 cats and I talked her out of it..so now I get to go cut the cat's nails every week  but its ok I love those cats and I would rather take time out to trim the nails them have them be declawed!
That sucks about you SIL...Me the person I am would break her off , tell her to get her sh!t together and tell the hubby to play the Father/husband roll as well!! Many many people have job where they are 100% commited to it, and they are also 100% commited to their family, it's just something that you have to do, you have to learn how to control both, and him being the father/husband figure he should step up and be like " look this is how it is and this is how its going to be" It is not fair that he gives more to his job than his family...But what can you do..thats hard bc you are the SIL..are you close with her? |
oh i know, i love you to pieces and i'm glad to know that it hurts them. i didn't realize it.
i've had cats that were barnyard cats that come and go for years growing up, but never a house cat. i may get one when we have our own house as long as i can litter train and get a really short haired one. i'm huge on the whole shedding thing. hence the Yorkie!!
anyways yea it's sad about my SIL. it's my hubbie's sister, she's the oldest and her story is long and awful so get your popcorn out:
she got with this dude when she was in high school, she got pregnant young and married him. he was abusive, on steriods, and a total a hole. he's now a well known tattoo artist in Chicago. anyways, they broke up once during her younger years i think before she has her first son, and she moved to MO where her mom, dad, and brothers moved. she lived with her mom's cousin for awhile and this guy comes to MO and lures her back to Chicago with him. this upset everyone in her family and broke their hearts. she was at that point hopeless and a total disappointment to her family. so then she has her first child and then they finally divorce. after the divorce she gets pregnant again from him and has her second son. finally she really does leave him for good and goes off to marry his BROTHER. they both turn their lives around and get saved and want to live a Christian life (they are both tattooed up from their past lives and her new hubbie looks hard) anyways, hubbie #2 has three children from a previous marriage. his ex wife is on drugs really really bad and kids children often slept in one room filled with dog poop and all of this woman's new babies from other men. i think she has like 6 kids now and is in and out of jail a lot. so hubbie #2 has a 15 year old girl, a 12 yr old son and a 11 yr old girl
after SIL and new hubbie married, they had a little baby girl too. so there's 6 children together now. they got into a nasty custody battle over SIL's two boys with her first hubbie. they lost....sad and sucked...so rather than stay in Chicago where her job is and fight it again...they move to MO which they claim was God's will. i don't deny that God does have a plan...but all of us were not sure that was His plan for them because now she is driving/flying to chicago once or twice a month for work, the rest of the time works at home, they are in MAJOR debt from the court stuff and moving and its a mess. but finally another year goes by, they lived with my husbands mom and dad awhile and put my husband out of his own room during Christmas break from college...but they finally get their own place and get back on their feet again. they only have the little girl with them at first, they had gotten the 15 yr old girl to live with SIL's parents my inlaws for awhile to get her away from her mother. that went ok and then they took her with them when they got their new house...then the also got the 10 yr old daughter and then eventually this summer got the boys back from dad 1. so they have 5 kiddos now. but while the custody battle thing happend 15 yr old daughter had some issues with sexual promiscuity and running around and she ran away overnight at a boy's house. they placed her into a teen challenge program for 15 months and she's loosing her entire JR. year of high school from this now. but she is getting help and doing better. i dont' know if she needed this extreme of a measure or just better parenting because her father (hubbie 2) doesn't seem to know how to be a man and step up in his house and discipline the kids and lets them run all over the neighborhood and crap like that.
so now there's the daughter 10 yr old issue i mentioned before and it's going to end up just exactly like 15 yr old girl because they won't do anything to discipline and FORCE their authority over her, they just let her get away with sassing and being a brat. she needs serious mental help from the living situation with her drugged out mom and she needs my SIL to be that Mother to her that she never really had. but instead they just fight each other and SIL isn't much of a mom to her, because she's too focused on the cute little baby girl now 4 and her own sons.
and then throw in her two son's sports and the oldest's football skills and this little girl gets ignored most of the time.
and throw in the dog and cat that were both adopted from shelters and needed training and attention too and it's a huge MESS
and and did i mention my MIL is a psycho!? she's seriously mentally ill most likely from all the stress her daughter caused her and will not admit she's the problem and everyone else is always to blame for her issues. she's 100% negative all the time and she's mean and horrible and it's really really hard to keep my mouth shut and respect her as my MIL because she's an evil, manipulative and literally CRAZY woman.
anyways that's the whole story of my wonderful in laws.
there is an older brother and his wife who moved back to Chicago, he's a police man there just like FIL used to be and they just had my beautiful nephew in August and are wonderful, stable people
and younger BIL who is going to be in college forever and never move out i think and he's 21 now. and he hates his mom's attitude but has no money to move out and leave her
and then there's my hubbie, the most stable, wonderful, hardworking man in the world that i love dearly and we have a nice home and good jobs and do everything we can to not cause anymore stress on his mom and I try to stay far away from her and not talk to her as much as possible.
that's my story...hope you enjoyed the saga!!