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Originally Posted by celstu1  How old are you guys? He sounds like he is immature also. Im sure his jealousy stems from his insecurity with himself but its not fair to take it on you. You are not the one who let yourself go like he did. (I didn't mean to sound mean if that did, but its a fact that needs to be faced by him.) You don't need to join a gym to work out. He can do things at home to help himself. Walk outside, get some cheap free weights and use them, lunges and squats, situps, pushups, etc... all these things can be done at home and will help tremendously.
I don't think its fair to you that you need to watch what you say and how you say it in regards to him for fear of him getting mad. The fact of the matter is, he did this to himself and he needs to a) accept it and b) change it. Maybe its time you put your foot down in a mature way and tell him that you want to help him, that you know he does not feel good about himself but you love him as is, you want him to be happy and you will do whatever to help him get to that point, but you will not be insulted and treated with no respect, you will not let him put you down because of HIS faults. Its good to pamper him a little, baby and handhold.. but its also good to use a tough love approach to make him see that he cannot hurt you while he is hurting. Its not fair to you. Especially when his 'pain' is something he can take control of.
I hope I didnt take it too far or read into it too much. I really do think you guys make an adorable couple. I really want him to treat you well. but you shouldn't have to fear talking to him, thats what marriage has to be about. |
He is 23 turning 24 in a week ( which gives him more insecurities because he hasnt become anything in the world - iknow this because of when he was drunk that night) And I am 20.
You did not take it too far. It is the advice that I need and wanted. He also has asthma which he hides behind. But i take care of him so much I will wake up in the middle of the night just to give him his nebulizer. He needs to lose the weight or he will die at a young age. I try to feed him healthy stuff but the amount of food he eats doesnt help it. I am really going to have to put my foot down and try to help him with his problems. It is really tearing us apart. I'm tierd of fearing of opening my feelings to him because it will end up in a fight. I'm going to do what you said and I will give ya a update
