So sorry that you are having to go thru this. I lost both of my cats within a year of each other. They were sisters from the same litter and would have been 14. I was absolutely devastated and continued to be so for a very long time. To make things worse, each time my husband had to go out of town for business so I was dealing with my grief-alone. With R, my first cat, I cried and cried and cried some more. When I got her ashes back, it sort of helped...each morning I would say good morning (I would do that everyday when she was alive) and hold the box with her ashes close to my heart. It probably sounds very strange, but I almost felt her nuzzling my heart. It was as though I could feel that she was okay...at peace and rest, out of pain. When I lost her sister, I was lost again. She had been my queenie and she knew it. What got me thru was that my hubby told me that she waited until she was sure we had someone else to take care of us--Hot Rod. She was always letting her sister get all the attention but when she wanted some loving her sister would relinquish my lap over. It still hurts very much but I choose to cherish the joy they brought throughout their short lives. I smile everday when I look at a couple of my most favorite pictures of them. It is okay to cry...don't try to stop it. Let it out and then choose to remember the joy you shared with your little one and smile as much as you cry...she brought you happiness too-don't let that be forgotten. Hugs. |