Aubrey! I feel soooo bad! Lately it seems that things are so up in the air for you! Most of us go through times of turmoil like you are in right now. I know its really hard and scary right now. When my ex and I of 10 years broke up, my life was in turmoil for months, then it settled down and I had to deal with the grief it all, but that was after months of being like "What the heck more can go wrong right now????" UUGGHHH!!!!
Sometimes our most carefully laid plans never come to fruition. (never come to be) and thats ok cuz thats the way it was meant to work out. I know everything will work out for you in the end, exactly the way you'll be the happiest and most fulfilled! Sometimes things take a little longer than we plan them to, but its really not up to us to plan our lives when those plans are based on anyone or anything that is not solely ourself. Does that make sense? In other words you can plan to get married to a person when you cannot guarantee for another person that its what they want. You cannot plan to have a job when you don't have the ability to hire yourself. So accomplish your own personal goals that have 100% to do with you alone and the rest will all fall into place
(((HUGS))) sounds like you need one!!