Mandee,
I am glad you are going to church today. I know exactly how you feel about loving your church and how you feel better being there. I do too! I hope you can talk to your pastor and he and your husband can get things straightened out. Sounds like you are walking a fine line trying to keep your husband happy and keep yourself happy. Hopefully you will be able to keep going to church and will continue to feel good about yourself!
Keep us posted.