Okay, I hope no one gets mad at me for this post.
FIRSTLY, I agree with you about making them help around the house, etc. and I absolutly think you are being a good Mom - NOT a bad one.
But. Now I'm going to speak from a 14-year-old's point of view. IMO, there is NOTHING worse than when a parent (including mine!) wakes up one day and just decides that things need to change. Going from having to do nothing to having a list of chores is quite a big change, especially for kids who aren't used to it. Honestly, just deciding suddenly like that WILL cause a lot of fighting and all that will result is a lot of angry parents and kids. I think that something like this is best if it's worked on over time. I don't think it's fair to anyone to just spring a list of chores on the kids all of the sudden. and by anyone I include parents. What I mean by that is that yes, while stuff is getting done, are your kids not complaining the whole time? Is it REALLY that less stressful for you than it was before, having to listen to them scream and stop? If they had more time to get adjusted to the new things you want them to do, and if they started off with only 1 or 2 chores and then you added some on, I think things would go a lot smoother. Read the posts in this thread. A lot of people are saying "from the time my kids could reach the buttons" "That's the way it's always been" etc. That's not the situation with your kids. You kids aren't used to it, and it'll take them some time to get used to having that kind of responsibility.
PLEASE, I'm asking everyone, don't not pay attention this opinion of mine because I'm a teenager. This is how I feel when my parents put me in that kind of situation, so I'm guessing your kids may feel something like that. If my parents just kind of eased it onto us, I know I'd be a lot more willing to help out.
I support your decision to include them.
