Oh, GIRL! You MUST get access
Or get a co-worker or three involved. You could:
1. Wrap everything in his cubicle with aluminum foil or cellophane, or newspaper, or if you wanna spend some $$$, astroturf
2. Cover every surface with post-it notes, and write the name of each item on them (pencil, keyboard, etc.)
3. Totally rearrange the entire cubicle so that it's totally opposite of the way it was
4. Have someone totally switch cubicles with him, that would really get him
That's all I can come up with
I can't wait to hear about what you decide to do*evil grin*