I am just
sick for you and your bf. I cannot imagine how devastating this must be for you except to say that I have kids and I love my puppy like my own child. If anything were to happen to her, I don't know how I'd recover.
But as others have said, time will heal your wound, believe it or not. I've had grief over deaths in my life and I after reading accounts of near death experiences, I can say that they are very comforting when it comes to pets. Read pet accounts on this website for some comfort in your loss:
http://www.near-death.com/
I am praying that you find comfort and peace and that your grief passes swiftly. Little Ella is romping with her other puppy friends now in heaven and will meet you at the rainbow bridge one day, unaware that any time has passed at all.