im glad.if anyone remebers my post on how magnum died, i would guess you know how quilty i feel. magnum had gotten hurt from a fall a bout a month earlier, and was getting better we thought. then we noticed him walking sideways sometimes, and he was so small 1lb at 6 months, anyways, he was following me from room to room ( i wish i had gotten bells for his collar) the baby was sick and screaming, i was by myself, i stepped on a chair to get some medicine and when i stepped down i didnt know magnum was ther, he never moved or squirmed...this is so hard to talk about..i stepped down on his head, and it was awful!!!! i still remeber the sound, the blood, i can still remeber what it felt like..i screamed and screamed started calling my husband, and my parents i was caring his little body everyone, i got blood on all the walls, the floors and furniture, my clothes were soaked..i feel so bad
i do remeber feeling him kiss me once on my heel, i think, and i dreamed about him once, but thats it.. im so ashamed and feel so bad and wondered if that is why he isnt around that he is upset or scared of me. |