[mamartini]

I have been a member here for more than 10 years and I have been able to gain so much information from this great group of people. I have not been active here in many years. Today I am here to report the loss of my baby, Cookie. She was fine but acting a bit strange at bedtime on Saturday. She was up and down all night but I didn't think anything of it because our other little one was also acting strange and it was getting ready to storm. When we got up Sunday morning we found vomit everywhere. There was so much. I immediately starting working to help her keep from getting dehydrated. No matter what I tried she just could not keep anything down. She kept hiding from me and appeared as if she just could not get comfortable. We took her to the emergency vet (over 2 hours away) and they gave her subcutaneous fluids and anti-nausea meds and told us she would be fine but to take her to her vet the next day if she did not seem any better. She did not seem to vomit any more but she was even more uncomfortable. She would not lay with me and we kept finding her hiding in the corner behind things and behind our couch. I decided to stay with her on the couch but she wanted our bed. I think I finally fell asleep around 3am and by 5am I just knew there was no way she was going to make it. Our vet opened at 8am and I just prayed that I could get her there in time. She whined and moaned. She was unable to walk more than a couple steps at a time. She was refusing liquids too. I just help her and talked to her, petting her to try and keep her calm. She laid her sweet little head on my shoulder and stayed that way until she was gone. I am so broken, empty, lonely. This is the hardest loss I have ever had in my entire lifetime. I want my baby back and I know I will never be able to have her back. I took the report from the emergency vet to our vet and they said she possibly would not have made it but it would have been better to put her on IV fluids. How do you move on after this? Is it right or even appropriate to get another puppy this soon? I know that Cookie loved me as much as I loved her. She was my sidekick. There was not a single minute that went by that I did not have her by my side. I have been working from home with the Covid stuff and she has her own special little place right next to me in my office where she would sleep most of the day and she would take breaks with me every hour for a short walk, and spend time on my lap playing with the kids over video (I am a child and family therapist). I was even contemplating taking her to work with me when we went back into the office. I'm so broken. I just don't know what to do.