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Originally Posted by SinatraFrankie  I have a two year old. She is my world, I love her. She sleeps with me and is by my side from the time I get home until I leave for work. She's so loving toward me, my husband and grandson. But she hates everyone else. She wants to bite everyone but us. Please help me figure out why she does this. I would love to hear from anyone else that has this problem. I will say that my grandson is the only child she likes. I do know its because he normally sleeps with me when he visits and he has handled her since she came home to me at 12 weeks old. I've had two vets tell me this is normal for Yorkies. But I have an 11 year old one that would'nt hurt a flea... |
She's resource-guarding you three as many unstable dogs tend to do in time. Time for some re-training. Non-aggressive or more settled dogs never need this type of guidance as it comes innately to some of them. It's only "normal" for owners who haven't established clear, loving, responsible leadership roles with their dogs to soon fall "victim" to their whims. We all pretty much start out that way and either learn as we go to do better or the dogs take over, begin to steer us in the way they like, however unstable. Our dogs see us as their best resource, the avenue to all they desire and never being taught differently, began to get idea to first curry favor with us as puppies and then, begin to manipulate us into behaviors they think they need, wanting us all for themselves, never having been taught differently. Time for Mom/Dad to step in and teach them a different way.
Stay upbeat, not angry, but immediately halt all attempts on your dog's part to take control. The moment your dog fixates on someone with intent to back them off or harm them - wide, fixated eyes, intensely glaring at them, ears alert, the body stiff, tail stiff or gradually wagging and mouth tense(not happy, open & smiling), growls, acts belligerently or even acts too fast and snaps at them before you know it, you
suddenly stand up with a loud, firm "NO!", clapping your hands and then pointing at her/him and advancing quickly right into them, forcing her/him to back off and turn away, staring them down as a wolf parent might do an unruly pup or pack member.
Just as important is the "No Free Lunch" program. Take up their bowls, their toys, any stashes of resources they have around the house and now your little one must learn to show obedience to you before getting anything. The most unruly dogs quickly love it as they are required to "ask" first before they get anything they want or need, which they soon learn by accommodating whatever you ask of them before they get what they want: up on the couch, the bed, a cuddle, access to their water bowl(the 1st 2 weeks of training only), dinner, a treat, toy, or to go potty or walk outside. They never get to walk in front of you. They are learning to show you respect and obedience and, in the process, how to be a team member, work with you for positive rewards. Always make your requests in a matter-of-fact, friendly, happy voice and never snapping out harsh commands. They come to realize they can learn to do what you ask and are always getting high praise and reward for doing it and they feel smart, part of the team and slowly they begin to try to stop always trying to run the pack anymore - realizing Mom and Dad are in control, will ALWAYS love, care for and provide for me but I, in turn, as a member of this little pack, learn to obey them as my part. Dogs are like unruly toddlers who are far better and happier, safer, when not left to run things as they want but as Mom says, even though they think they know better. Soon they learn that keeping Mom and Dad happy with them gains them far more than misbehavior.
By requiring certain behaviors that teach our sweet babies patience and restraint, dogs slowly learn that you have taken over their little pack and will always love them, never scare or hurt them or neglect them, but that now, you are requiring they show you the act of respect by performing a certain act before they get their wants and needs met. You are no longer their manipulated"patsy". Believe this or not, smart, savvy dogs LOVE the act of performing a request/command of ours and getting our sudden, loving response, showing we appreciate how very smart they are. They preen and glory in that praise and teamwork situation. Dogs, like kids, need structure and knowing they can count on us to feel settled, secure and happy in their homes as members, not leaders, of it. Once they know Mom/Dad are in full, loving control and their needs will be met, they lose their need to control things, resource guarding tendency and glady relinquish leadership to us, no longer feeling they must keep us all to themselves or they won't get what they need. Frankly, it takes the monkey off their backs and they can settle into their proper roles in our little family, way happier, settled, secure and fulfilled then they were.
If your dog has no obedience training, teach her or him to sit or shake hands or whatever you'd like before getting his/her request met. Always generously praise and reward that behavior w/in 8 seconds with whatever treat or toy your dog most loves. Your dog will soon respond more quickly to each request and even start to learn to always "ask" before doing most things for the quick, positive feedback they ALWAYS get from you. They soon become a happy, willing partner to this new program for the feeling of responsiblity and pride in
themselves for they teamwork feeling they acquire along the way. You become a happier, more loving team.
There are many "No Free Lunch" programs on the internet, all of them free, just take the time to read and adopt which one works best for you and your dog. And if you are half-interested or too busy to care to take this positive-reinforcement training on, just learn to accept that your sweet, loving baby might soon become a biter of
anyone who does something they disagree with, even you or your grandson. It's all about loving them enough to take on gentle, caring leadership. Trust me, you'll all love each other better and meet each others' needs better when everyone plays their proper role in your family. Hugs and happy times!!!