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SweetChloe · 09-10-2017, 05:54 AM

Hi everyone,
It's been a long time since I have been on Yorkie Talk. A child with a life threatening illness, recovered after 4 years thankfully and life being chaos has left me little time. I used to be here every day and this community was always wonderful. So even though it has been so long that I didn't remember my login details and had to start a new account I wanted to share Chloe's passing with you.

A couple of years ago I became concerned as Chloe had started to present with a honking cough. After a number of visits it was determined that she had collapsing trachea. I was given meds and told that she would be fine. In the 13 visits that followed in the next couple of years I never heard and my daughters never heard that her condition was serious. I was told that many dogs live an entire lifespan with the condition. Everything I wanted to hear and I didn't pursue any further.

She was on meds that really didn't change her condition and even after a friend watched her at our home for a week and failed to give her any meds she was still the exact same. Meds no meds no difference. Again I didn't worry as she was still coping.

Like the frog boiling in an ever warming pot of water, it was too late that things got bad. She had over time gotten worse but the vet wasn't concerned and so I too wasn't concerned. She could no longer go to work with me, go for walks, play or get excited. She still loved cuddles and belly rubs and of course her food and treats. She was still happy.

Monday night she had a rough one. She had had them in the past and morning came and she seemed better. Was told she was fine all day. Got home and she sounded awful. Within an hour I was on the phone with the vet. I brought her in and they took a look at her when she was in the waiting room and seemed unconcerned. I waited an hour to see the vet. Was prescribed a steroid inhaler and still seeming unconcerned they sent her home. I gave her the inhaler and although she still sounded bad, it was a bit better. I was exhausted and went to bed. My daughter was downstairs with her. I couldn't bring her to bed as my husbands dogs get her going.

At 6 am I was woken by my daughter who said for the last 4 hours she had been really struggling. Rushed back to the vets and within minutes had to make the worst decision. She was dying, medical intervention stood very little chance and wasn't recommended. I could bear the thought of her dying with strangers performing treatments that wouldn't work. I could have let her go without intervening or put an end to her suffering. I chose to stop it. I had a choice have this done in the back or with me. I said bring me my dog. I held her in my arms. She was so terrified, she was in panic, she couldn't breathe. I held her and talked to her as they gave her the shot that would end her life. I couldn't comfort her. My baby left this world in terror. It's tearing up. It's been 4 days and I can't keep anything down, I can't sleep and when I do I wake up within an hour. I am wracked with guilt and grief and those last moments are on a loop replaying in my mind. I keep talking to her and singing the song I made up to her that I sang to her each day.

She was the most wonderful, weird, loving little soul and I will never be the same with her gone.

09-10-2017, 05:54 AM	#1
SweetChloe Yorkie Yakker Join Date: Sep 2017 Location: ONTARIO Posts: 33	My sweet girl is gone. Hi everyone, It's been a long time since I have been on Yorkie Talk. A child with a life threatening illness, recovered after 4 years thankfully and life being chaos has left me little time. I used to be here every day and this community was always wonderful. So even though it has been so long that I didn't remember my login details and had to start a new account I wanted to share Chloe's passing with you. A couple of years ago I became concerned as Chloe had started to present with a honking cough. After a number of visits it was determined that she had collapsing trachea. I was given meds and told that she would be fine. In the 13 visits that followed in the next couple of years I never heard and my daughters never heard that her condition was serious. I was told that many dogs live an entire lifespan with the condition. Everything I wanted to hear and I didn't pursue any further. She was on meds that really didn't change her condition and even after a friend watched her at our home for a week and failed to give her any meds she was still the exact same. Meds no meds no difference. Again I didn't worry as she was still coping. Like the frog boiling in an ever warming pot of water, it was too late that things got bad. She had over time gotten worse but the vet wasn't concerned and so I too wasn't concerned. She could no longer go to work with me, go for walks, play or get excited. She still loved cuddles and belly rubs and of course her food and treats. She was still happy. Monday night she had a rough one. She had had them in the past and morning came and she seemed better. Was told she was fine all day. Got home and she sounded awful. Within an hour I was on the phone with the vet. I brought her in and they took a look at her when she was in the waiting room and seemed unconcerned. I waited an hour to see the vet. Was prescribed a steroid inhaler and still seeming unconcerned they sent her home. I gave her the inhaler and although she still sounded bad, it was a bit better. I was exhausted and went to bed. My daughter was downstairs with her. I couldn't bring her to bed as my husbands dogs get her going. At 6 am I was woken by my daughter who said for the last 4 hours she had been really struggling. Rushed back to the vets and within minutes had to make the worst decision. She was dying, medical intervention stood very little chance and wasn't recommended. I could bear the thought of her dying with strangers performing treatments that wouldn't work. I could have let her go without intervening or put an end to her suffering. I chose to stop it. I had a choice have this done in the back or with me. I said bring me my dog. I held her in my arms. She was so terrified, she was in panic, she couldn't breathe. I held her and talked to her as they gave her the shot that would end her life. I couldn't comfort her. My baby left this world in terror. It's tearing up. It's been 4 days and I can't keep anything down, I can't sleep and when I do I wake up within an hour. I am wracked with guilt and grief and those last moments are on a loop replaying in my mind. I keep talking to her and singing the song I made up to her that I sang to her each day. She was the most wonderful, weird, loving little soul and I will never be the same with her gone.