Sounds like he's quite overwhelmed. For the sake of a safe recovery for both of them, if I were in your shoes, I would do whatever I could to separate them for now. I'd stick to that very strictly for at least for an entire week.
They should be restrained regardless and not run around the first 5 days to ensure the surgery incision heals well (and doesn't get infected or open up). For both my boy and girl, I crated them for 7 days and only let them out for potty breaks. It sounds really sad, but I felt like it was best for them to rest and not to move around at all. The worst thing would be if they accidentally jumped and opened up their incision. I'd be devastated!
I had mine neutered and spayed separately because of their age difference, so I never experienced this. I imagine he's just readjusting to the change in his hormones? It probably doesn't help that there's a change in her hormones too, which is confusing him.
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