Oh Deb,
I would give anything to be able to take away your pain. Only time can do that, and even then you will always have this place in your heart where things are not the same. We went through this 10 months ago with Bandit and I know what your are going through. Please tell hubby not to beat himself up. I doubt that he suffocated, he wouldn't have just peacefully stopped breathing like it seems that he did. He would have been fighting under there enough to wake you if he was suffocating. This is a terrible tragedy, and not anyone's fault. Take your time mourning him, he was your baby! I did not get out of bed for 2 days when Bandit died, and I realized afterwards that that was the best thing I could do for myself. Trace is ok, but you and hubby have to take care of each other. I pray that soon you will be able to think of him with happy memories. I know right now you don't believe that could ever happen, but it will. You are in my thoughts and I will say an extra prayer for your family today. |