Cut your family some slack. Your boys are like mine -- very different, but similar too. Would you believe that in a half lit room, at a distance, I mix up my boys.
My older brother and his family had to constantly ask who was who, Max or Teddy. A couple times, I really had to look closely.
Before I had my Yorkies, my eye was not very discerning. Many looked alike. Now I can probably identify by name close to 300 different Yorkies from friends and acquaintances here on YT and Facebook.
Other breeds, I have trouble with because I don't pay close attention.