[107barney]

It sounds to me like you are doing very well to care for your dog. I'm sorry to hear of her illnesses. I don't have any great words of wisdom because each person has a different way they cope with illness and life's end. I have a dog w/ a heart issue and I know that it's a matter of time before he has to say goodbye. I won't let him have bad days, and won't have him die in my arms at home, he will be put to sleep before his quality of life goes downhill. I have owned this dog since he was 8 weeks old and he is almost 15. I am very blessed to still be able to enjoy him and know that he is enjoying his life too. When that changes, I'll say goodbye. I pre-mourned his death similar to what you're going through, and once I realized that it was happening, I felt better. If you need a little relaxation medication from your physician, I see nothing wrong in asking for it. I'll keep you and your pup in my prayers.