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ClaudianPhoebe · 01-20-2015, 11:05 AM

It has been a little over two weeks since losing my best friend Phoebe. We gave her the gift of a pain free life on January 5. If you haven't read my post, please feel free. It was only a month ago (a little more) that we definitively found out she has a tumor taking up her entire liver. She started showing some signs over a year ago:

1. potbelly
2. increased huger- i am talking famished all the time
3. wetting the bed while she was sleeping
4. increased urination / increased thirst
5. thinking of the hair (only a few months ago)

When she got really sick in late August and was near death due to bloody stools, vomiting and dehydration, they diagnosed her with possible kidney failure although her protein was on the low end of high. Her electrolytes though were off the charts- especially the potassium/mag and very low calcium. She bounced back, my little fighter and a for a few months, she was almost back to normal except i noticed a loss in stamina, but she was 13.5 and I just figured old age/arthritis. December 9, she started to show signs again, but different this time, eating, but a little more fussy, more lethargic (as in not always greeting me at the door) and increased ab sign. Took her to the vet and they thought possible spleen cancer and she should be euthanized. Again, she bounced back a little and was eating that fried chicken liver like nobody's business. however, her interest in going for walks went away. Finally, on 12/23 I took her for a second opinion and they diagnosed her with a liver tumor. Their news was not only earth shattering but also troubling because they indicated that some of these liver tumors grow very slowly and take a year and sometimes longer- see symptoms that started over a year ago (which i had been talking to her vet about and they confirmed no diabetes, no thyroid...probably just old age....REALLY? Think again, Vet #1). Anyway, second vet recommended that i not euthanize her if she was still interested in eating, able to walk and relieve herself in the right spot (now her pee pad vs. the grass outside). So we did (gladly). However, Phoebe's fate took a turn for the worse on January 1 when she said NO to scrambled eggs and bacon. I knew this was the start of her downfall. she quickly declined and began tumbling out of her bed to get water and relieve herself, couldn't walk, would stare at the floor with her head buried down in the pillow or at the wall. she no longer expressed interest in anyone, including me. I still caressed her, slept with her and tried to make her comfortable as I knew that she still could feel my love as she began to lose touch with the world. On January 5, we set her free at about 12:20 p.m. My question is about how quickly she died. I have heard numerous times, that they don't go quickly and jerk or "fight" it. Basically, i could see Phoebe fading after the first sedation shot, the life just went away in her eyes and within seconds of her second injection, she died. I am guessing she went so quickly because she was tired and had been fighting illness for God knows how long. I am glad it went fast but am also feeling a little guilty now because she must have been ravaged with this tumor and even though she only started rapidly declining on January 1, I wonder how sick she was all along. Or maybe cancer does this...it takes them away quickly and ferociously. I am also mad at myself because I should have pushed Vet #1 when i started noticing these symptoms over a year ago. I actually thought it could be Cushings...classic symptoms, but they assured me unlikely and maybe it wasn't since she did have a liver tumor or maybe she had multiple things. Can Cushings lead to a liver tumor if left untreated? so many questions that will remain unanswered. I do know that i gave her a wonderful life and I am sure she knew how much I loved her...maybe why she held on and bounced back for her mamma,not once, but twice. I miss her everyday and have hung a huge canvas photo directly across from my bed so that every morning I see her and every night i say sweet dreams...must like when she was on earth. Totally, miss our routines and even though i have two wonderful children and am quite busy working a FT job, there is still a hole in my life right now. Another great thing I did this weekend was submit a letter to Phoebe through the website "A Letter to My Dog". They published a best seller a few years ago and still publish letters online. I am hoping to see my letter published soon. It was very comforting to do that. I wish I would have come up with that idea. I hope you all experiencing the loss of a wonderful yorkie in your life can comfort soon.

01-20-2015, 11:05 AM	#1
ClaudianPhoebe Yorkie Talker Join Date: Jan 2015 Location: Chicago Posts: 11	Question about Recent Euthanasia It has been a little over two weeks since losing my best friend Phoebe. We gave her the gift of a pain free life on January 5. If you haven't read my post, please feel free. It was only a month ago (a little more) that we definitively found out she has a tumor taking up her entire liver. She started showing some signs over a year ago: 1. potbelly 2. increased huger- i am talking famished all the time 3. wetting the bed while she was sleeping 4. increased urination / increased thirst 5. thinking of the hair (only a few months ago) When she got really sick in late August and was near death due to bloody stools, vomiting and dehydration, they diagnosed her with possible kidney failure although her protein was on the low end of high. Her electrolytes though were off the charts- especially the potassium/mag and very low calcium. She bounced back, my little fighter and a for a few months, she was almost back to normal except i noticed a loss in stamina, but she was 13.5 and I just figured old age/arthritis. December 9, she started to show signs again, but different this time, eating, but a little more fussy, more lethargic (as in not always greeting me at the door) and increased ab sign. Took her to the vet and they thought possible spleen cancer and she should be euthanized. Again, she bounced back a little and was eating that fried chicken liver like nobody's business. however, her interest in going for walks went away. Finally, on 12/23 I took her for a second opinion and they diagnosed her with a liver tumor. Their news was not only earth shattering but also troubling because they indicated that some of these liver tumors grow very slowly and take a year and sometimes longer- see symptoms that started over a year ago (which i had been talking to her vet about and they confirmed no diabetes, no thyroid...probably just old age....REALLY? Think again, Vet #1). Anyway, second vet recommended that i not euthanize her if she was still interested in eating, able to walk and relieve herself in the right spot (now her pee pad vs. the grass outside). So we did (gladly). However, Phoebe's fate took a turn for the worse on January 1 when she said NO to scrambled eggs and bacon. I knew this was the start of her downfall. she quickly declined and began tumbling out of her bed to get water and relieve herself, couldn't walk, would stare at the floor with her head buried down in the pillow or at the wall. she no longer expressed interest in anyone, including me. I still caressed her, slept with her and tried to make her comfortable as I knew that she still could feel my love as she began to lose touch with the world. On January 5, we set her free at about 12:20 p.m. My question is about how quickly she died. I have heard numerous times, that they don't go quickly and jerk or "fight" it. Basically, i could see Phoebe fading after the first sedation shot, the life just went away in her eyes and within seconds of her second injection, she died. I am guessing she went so quickly because she was tired and had been fighting illness for God knows how long. I am glad it went fast but am also feeling a little guilty now because she must have been ravaged with this tumor and even though she only started rapidly declining on January 1, I wonder how sick she was all along. Or maybe cancer does this...it takes them away quickly and ferociously. I am also mad at myself because I should have pushed Vet #1 when i started noticing these symptoms over a year ago. I actually thought it could be Cushings...classic symptoms, but they assured me unlikely and maybe it wasn't since she did have a liver tumor or maybe she had multiple things. Can Cushings lead to a liver tumor if left untreated? so many questions that will remain unanswered. I do know that i gave her a wonderful life and I am sure she knew how much I loved her...maybe why she held on and bounced back for her mamma,not once, but twice. I miss her everyday and have hung a huge canvas photo directly across from my bed so that every morning I see her and every night i say sweet dreams...must like when she was on earth. Totally, miss our routines and even though i have two wonderful children and am quite busy working a FT job, there is still a hole in my life right now. Another great thing I did this weekend was submit a letter to Phoebe through the website "A Letter to My Dog". They published a best seller a few years ago and still publish letters online. I am hoping to see my letter published soon. It was very comforting to do that. I wish I would have come up with that idea. I hope you all experiencing the loss of a wonderful yorkie in your life can comfort soon.