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Originally Posted by Larry92  Your right about the the leash, I was just pointing out my concerns but I accept that that may be a way to help him.
But in no way did I say Jake had his own way constantly? I said he lives like a king and has more space to play when he wants to but in no way is he spoiled by us. In the way he lives like a king I meant he has a nice life, toys, food and people to play with him but not when he's naughty at all.
We are not continuing all current behaviours as I've said different things have been done to try and stop him from doing it so we are changing them once we have established they do not work, be it a month or two months we give him a chance to get use to the new change and if it doesn't make a difference we then go back to the drawing board.
I understand that the way his is, is our fault but this isn't just a new thing, he was like this when he came and he was much worse. Where you say we are doing everything wrong by not teaching him and then blaming him for his personality or behaviour, how is that so? I have said from the beginning we have TRIED since day one to correct these things and we are 18 months on and yes he has got better but not the stage where we are living comfortably with him and he is enriching our lives because he's not. Maybe in the end we are just not the people for him and he wont end up living with us, who knows. But I am not a push over with dogs, yes I love them but I believe they should behave in a normal way just like my two do at home, I have never had a problem with them and my family has had dogs all their lives and we have never seen anything like Jake before. |
It's not so much about blame as changing your way of thinking. You are asking that a dog conform to your way of thinking but you are asking the impossible since he is a dog and you are not. Therefore, you have to communicate in a way that the dog understands. If you check my posts, you will see that I went through a lot of what you are talking about when I first got my dog. He never bit me or anyone but had I not been firm with him from the start and sought assistance and admitted to myself that I was not a professional (just a dog owner who wanted my dog to do as I said - when I said - but had no idea how to make this work) then it may very well have progressed to that.
You are not the right people for the dog if you are unable to change the way you think. You are very much the right people for the dog if you are willing to challenge your thinking and your behavior so that your dog can learn. Believe me, I know it is frustrating and that is why I'm trying to help.
I think you all really would benefit from seeking another trainer as the one you've had up til now seems incompetent (or out of touch with new methods at the very least) based on the advice you say you have been given so far.
Not all dogs are the same and some people will attribute human motivation to them i.e. my dog is stubborn and just refuses to learn. But, like humans, dogs learn in different ways just different DOG ways. For example, all children are near enough the same. They have eyes, noses, mouths etc. But, you and I know they don't all act the same and they do not all respond to things in the same way. Some kids will behave if you offer them candy, some toys, some TV and some seem to not behave at all until you TALK to them and find out that they're bothered by something or you've actually been giving them attention only when they misbehave.
Unfortunately, having an intelligent dog means you have to think outside of the box, sometimes. Just because the things you have tried aren't working doesn't mean that nothing will work. You have to consider that you may have tried a lot of wrong things, your expectations were too great, you were not consistent, etc.
Dogs are HARD work and they aren't for everyone. If you love him, keep at it! The work, if it's the RIGHT work, pays off in the end.
If you are really at the end and you can give no more, then find someone who is willing to put the work in.
It's only you who can decide re: if you keep him or not and how much work you're willing to put in.
I'm not making judgment at all, by the way. As I've said, I've been there.