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Originally Posted by jsbart  Thanks for your advice. I can tell you put a lot of thought into it. As I stated before, I've definitely come to the conclusion that what I was doing was wrong and have spent the last two days trying to make amends by showing probably too much attention. However, he has been so much better for the last two days, but I will try to tone it down and not pay him so much attention. I guess I was just trying to atone for my misguided behavior. You know, it's almost like he knows that I've come to an understanding that I was doing more harm than good.
I do want to say that he started behaving this way long before I tried to show him I was in charge. I felt like he became dominant maybe because I showed him more attention than he was used to. When it seemed to get worse, is when I tried to make him submissive which only made him fearful. I was pretty much at the end of ideas as to how to approach the problem. I think I may continue to keep him out of the bathroom. It hasn't seemed to make him feel threatened and in fact he has chosen to be with me more since he can't go to his "cave". I have two other dogs who stay in the house also and hope maybe since they are stable and calm some of their attitude will rub off on him. This may sound crazy but his facial expression has gone from looking mean to looking sweet again. Again, thanks for your thoughts and maybe soon he will be calmer and more relaxed. I think it's just in his nature to be anxious and I'm not expecting miracles--just want us both to be happy. |
The best way to handle a dominant or aggressive dog is to show his your leadership and not your dominance. Just require him to do things before he gets anything he wants - the Nothing In Life Is Free Program and get them busy having to do what we say before they get to play with a toy, go for a walk, get a meal, get a cuddle or kiss or get to join us on the couch or bed.
Also, setting boundaries and should they cross them and continue biting on the furniture leg after you've said, "No" or "Leave it", get up, pin them with your eyes and walk into their space and force them to stand down, turn away or leave the area. If they jump up onto the couch or bed and begin to growl should anyone else want to join them, get up and without rancor or anger or dominance, matter-of-factly remove them and require them to "ask" to get up. Always remain in teaching mode and teachers usually don't dominate but lead us along willingly. The dog will learn that you call the shots and in time will begin to learn, if he's not in pain or ill, that complying with your requests is the only way to get him what he wants out of life and will work hard to do things your reasonable way.
Reward good behavior and stop poor behavior and show him the right way to do things, and he'll begin to change his ways.
I disagree with keeping the bathroom door shut, myself, as I'd want this dog to have his space for right now and spend time with me by his personal choice - not because I was manipulating his access. He's "choosing" you right now because his den of safety is shut off. Give him a real choice and see what he does for the time being. That's his sanctuary right now and I'd allow him some time there as he learns to trust you again. I'd want him to stay out and come around me because he chooses to stay out - has gained trust in me and began to accept me - not because he couldn't get to his area of quiet and safety. But that's just my approach to rehab - on the dog's terms usually. I just think in the long run a dog will advance further faster if given viable choices, isn't manipulated and works it out himself. Heck, if you have other dogs in the house, he's got to be fairly scared of you to want to stay in there so much you've had to shut the door and I'd want him to have that ability as long as he's retaining his present level of fear and insecurity. He's had a rocky life - has changed homes too much and has no real respect or trust in humans right now so I'd give him his space for now. If this dog were in my home, I would allow him to heal and gain trust over time and after a couple of months of this, I'd make him coming around me extremely attractive with a treat and smile and a little praise and then let him otherwise be as this troubled dogs begins to learn to trust again.
Given time and ignoring him for a while, remaining aloof and giving him his choices, he's going to ultimately choose you and your companionship without any type of manipulation requiring him to stay away from his area of safety. Ultimately, he's your dog and you must do as you see fit but I'd be leery of manipulating him into spending time with me after some of the sessions you've described with him that probably left him pretty shaken and insecure around you. But he'll get over that - he's a dog - he'll take his time, begin to loathe his isolation and see you've changed your ways and begin to seek you out and by the time you've had him a year more, he'll be your constant companion! Don't feel bad for the things you were trying - the forcing him into submission and so forth - you just didn't know. We've all watched Cesar Millan shows and read books that encourage that type of dominance/bullying but it doesn't work on really insecure, fearful dogs and will do more harm than good for a while. Don't beat yourself up - your dog won't. He'll move on once he sees you've changed and you two will form a good, tight bond of forever friends.