Quote:
Originally Posted by AZME  I am so sorry. And ironically I have no verse and I am a poet. (go figure…but at some point I will be ready to write about this loss, having had to put down my sweet Louis a week ago). In the end I knew he was at peace and that it would be me who would now suffer.
And that's the truth. When he could no longer stand and was toppling over and looking at me like "what the hell do something" I had seen this same look in my sister's eyes as she lay dying from brain cancer some years back. Except I couldn't help her…I could only watch her life slip away, my only sister and best friend. It was agonizing to watch. She implored me with her eyes to help her but I couldn't. She was terminal from her diagnosis. And in a way I guess we are all terminal from our first breath.
And so the relief I felt when Louis took his last breath last Saturday morning as I held him and he passed and I kissed his warm furry ears for the last time and I knew his suffering had been minimized was real. How could I feel relieved after putting my best buddy down? I knew his life had been his own and that we'd crossed every hurdle together… through illnesses, and aging, liver congestion, bouts with pancreatitis, incontinence and arthritis and still we'd walked a nice walk daily until the last day and even then a short walk in the garden one last sniff of the lavender and even a little fertilizing of my limelight hydrangea.
It's hard to lose our best little friend but it is harder to fail them when they need us most to let them go to a place where their body never aches, they catch every rabbit (and then maybe make friends) they can roll in whatever they like, chase every ball down like a champ, have yummy perpetual treats and drink water from a cool spring. I wish you both peace in this decision. I think the anticipation is really one of the most difficult things I have ever experienced, but the licks I got on my face and a snuggle from Louis at the Vet's that morning and my little buddies calm demeanor was his thank you to me. |
Oh my gosh what beautiful words and sentiment. I'm 69 in November, Crystal's just gone 18 months today. My only desire is that I go on first and I want her little lead in my hand, so I'm ready to play when we meet again.
