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Just thinking of her lying on her back, eyes sightless, tongue hanging down is a horrifying scenario to contemplate and really upsets me.
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Surgery really is not as dramatic as you have it pictured in your mind. I work in the OR with humans and I can assure you that all of the anxiety over surgical procedures is way overblown. It's very quick and within a day she will be feeling like her old self. Sleepy, sure but that is just from the anesthesia metabolizing itself out of the liver.
Spay and neuter is a very common procedure and done millions of time a year. The risk of anesthesia is very low and pre op blood work should be done to check liver function prior to ANY surgical procedure. I have had pets my entire life and they have all been altered without any complications.
In addition to a spay it would also be a great time for a dental to polish up her teeth. Oral health care is very important to the health of our little ones.
Anesthesia is very safe!