[docmartin]

Crystal has been on her first 'season' for two weeks now. The flow seemingly stopped after a week, but her vulva is still swollen and tender. Her appetite rote has altered significantly too. Most mornings she now misses breakfast altogether, but harangues Dad for his toast and melted cheese etc.

This morning all had gone quiet - a bad thing with a 7lb bundle of dynamite! She'd made her way into the front lounge, which is normality shut off when she's unattended. We have a 'Soft Toy Yorkie', sitting on a sofa, a present from friends when Crystal come to live with us last June.

She was very busy gripping this effigy (which is more or less her size), in between her front legs, whilst attempting a 'retro hump maneuver' - the best description I can give really?

After a few frustrating minutes she tossed the limpid creature in the air by it's neck and walked away head in the air, accompanied by much reverse snorting!

Although it was definitely a 'locker room moment' in her development, I didn't laugh, but respected the wonder of nature and her endeavour to try and make babies. All together a bitter sweet episode of comedy and bathos.