I am so very sorry for your loss. I too am not a stranger to devastation, and my heart goes out to you. I am sending you light and love with intension that you may continue to heal, minute by minute, day by day. It is not easy, and I thank you for reaching out to me, as I know your pain must be unimaginable. As time passes, I cannot say that we forget, or that the pain disappears, it will always be there, and each person must heal in their own time, but as time hurries on, eventually we come to acceptance, as really there is not much else we can do. And the pain get's more distant, it's not quite as raw. I experience pain every day with the loss of my Muffin. I cry regularly and miss her so very much. You know, I really hope and wish that I was strong. It's funny you say that you think that I must be "one of the strongest persons around." Actually, I really don't feel strong at all. Isn't that strange? I feel, just, like, I go on, like days pass, I get up, I take care of my dad, I take care of my baby Cassie, and I do thank God that I still have my dearest baby with me, but it's like, I'm really not trying to do anything in particular. I just keep getting up every morning, as there is nothing else but that,
to do. Thank you for your prayers, they are so very very much needed and appreciated. I am very grateful, that in your time of such grief, that you have the strength and kindness to reach out to others. Thank you so very much for your kind and lovely words. You are in MY prayers also, and I will take your advice and try to focus a little more on caring for myself. Tomorrow we are going to see some puppies, at my dad's urging. I am really not sure that I am ready yet or that I ever will be, but he wants me to just go and look, so I am taking Cassie and my dad for a ride in the San Bernadino Mountains. I feel like I am only going to look, but it will be fun to see puppie, again. Anyway, I didn't mean to bend your ear. But thank you so much for your concern. I hold you close in my heart.
Shellie
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Originally Posted by anniernc  Haven't been on hardly at all in a few months. They found out my dad's bouts with pneumonia during the last year and a half was caused from aspiration. He ended up with a feeding tube and came back home in late Sept. We lost him on Nov 13 and I have been to devastated to do much of anything. Shelley tonight I decided to check on our yorkietalk friends and found your post and read it from beginning to end. You have been through so much. It's so very hard and stressful to take care of our sick babies and it sounds like Cassie was extremely sick. And then to also be responsible for a sick parent. And if you've not been tested enough to have to lose one of your precious babies. You have to be one of the strongest persons around. I don't know that I could have managed it all and you have done a wonderful job.
I am praying that Cassie will continue to improve everyday. She is such a beautiful little girl. I'm also praying for you and your dad. He needs you to take care of him but you've got to talk care of yourself too. Please remember to do that. |