Unbelief! That's what I felt when reading your post. I'm dumbstruck that this has befallen Muffin and you after what you have been through with Callie! I can't imagine how dead you must be inside and nothing I can say will make it better really. Nothing but time and acceptance when it finally comes will make it better and that's all in the future now. Who knows what awful combination of things causes the world to cross us like this and take our babies in the mid-stream of their lives but it happens all so often that it is heartbreaking. Makes you want to curl into a fetal shape and just stay there.
I do know that talking about the accident and what happened will help. Get it out. All the experts say it and I've been there and done it and know for a fact that putting it to paper, talking it out, spewing it out and saying it - putting the words and details of your feelings down in writing or out in words to someone does help acute pain to some degree and help the steam to start to escape, healing to begin. Crying, screaming, sitting numb for long hours and anger - all are part of this process, too. Only time passing and the body's natural defenses will start to help you past that and then somehow, you work through the worst part. I'm so sorry that words can't express how sorry and shocked I am to hear about sweet Muffin's accident. All I can do is be here for support and pray for you and hope that one day this pain and shock get better soon. I am so so sorry.
__________________  Jeanie and Tibbe One must do the best one can. You may get some marks for a very imperfect answer: you will certainly get none for leaving the question alone. C. S. Lewis |