 Thank you all
At 99 her walk is much slower but her mind is as sharp as it was at 50. I am so lucky to have been able to enjoy her for these 99 years.
She tells me that she prays every night it will be her last and it hurts me so much but I understand and accept that she is ready to die and believes she is going to a much better place. She has arthritis and it has become so painful for her to move. Her eyes no longer see enough to read and her hearing is about gone. Her friends are all gone. She hates being dependent on anyone and is so embarrassed that she misses so much of people's conversations. She has been an inspiration to me and has always been someone I'm proud of. We don't always agree but love conquers all.
Lisa, you are one in a million and I am so happy that we have become friends. Your such a special person and have shown me on so many occasions how much you put your own needs aside to help others. You and John are truly a match made in heaven.
Yesterday we had a steady stream of people coming to wish her Happy Birthday. One of the visitors was a former student of hers. She brought a poem tucked inside a card. I could see my Mom's chin quivering. Here is a copy of that poem that touched both of our hearts:
When tomorrow starts without me
And I'm not there to see;
If the sun should rise and find your eyes
All filled with tears for me.
I wish so much you wouldn't cry
The way you did today;
While thinking of the many things
We didn't get to say.
I know how much you love me
As much as I love you;
And each time that you think of me,
I know you'll miss me too.
But when tomorrow starts without me
Please try to understand,
That an angel came and called my name
And took me by the hand.
She said my place was ready
In heaven far above;
And that I'd have to leave behind,
All those I dearly love.
But as I turned to walk away,
A tear fell from my eye;
For all my life, I'd always thought
I didn't want to die.
I had so much to live for,
So much yet to do;
It seemed almost impossible,
That I was leaving you.
I thought of all the yesterdays,
The good ones and the bad;
I thought of all the love we shared,
And all the fun we had.
If I could relive yesterday
Just even for awhile,
I'd say goodbye and kiss you
And maybe see you smile.
But then I fully realized
That this could never be;
For emptiness and memories
Would take the place of me.
And when I thought of worldly things
I might miss come tomorrow;
I thought of you, and when I did,
My heart was filled with sorrow.
But when I walked through heaven's gates
I felt so much at home;
When God looked down and smiled at me
From His great golden throne.
He said, "This is eternity
And all I've promised you;
Today your life on earth is past,
But here it all starts anew."
"I promise no tomorrow,
But today will always last;
And since each day's the same day,
There's no longing for the past."
"But you have been so faithful,
So trusting and so true;
Though at times you did do things,
You knew you shouldn't do."
"But you have been forgiven
And now at last you're free;
So won't you take my hand
And share my life with me?"
So when tomorrow starts without me,
Don't think we're far apart
For every time you think of me,
I'm right here in your heart.
attributed to
David M. Romano - 1993 |