Lately, there are a lot of confrontations on the board about “please post kinder / nicer”’ vs. “don’t tell me how to post” type issues. This is something that presents an ongoing theme here, so we need to address it once and for all - and then agree to move forward.
The issues are these:
-There will always be members who think we should be posting in a kinder / nicer style and who will state that opinion
-There will always be members who will take offense to this suggestion as they feel they're being told how to post
-There will always be members whose posting style is either very direct or very emotional
And the bottom line is this: all three of these issues are as valid as the next one - and none of these issues are going away. Therefore, we all need to learn to tolerate our differences and respond better to them.
People who think we should be kinder here have a right to that opinion and a right to state such at any time. That doesn’t mean you’re being asked to agree to it, or to respond to it. And as far as opinions that we could be nicer here,
there are far worse things in the world we could be asked to tolerate.
And the tolerance does go both ways - those who hold the opinion that posting could be more kind have to tolerate and respond fairly to those who have a direct or emotional style of posting. While the opinion to post in a kinder style is welcome, it’s also fair to expect that if that opinion is posted - there could be some who respond negatively toward it and they are welcome to respond (respectfully, to be clear).
There is NO solution here that will make
everyone happy, so
please do not look for one. We do support those who think it could be kinder just as we support those who have a direct style. So, if someone posts requesting more kindness, DON’T respond if you’re ticked off by it; DO respond if you feel the need and you can do so calmly. But know that they *will* be supported in voicing their opinion. Likewise, if you see someone who you think is posting too harshly, DON’T respond if you’re ticked off by it; DO respond if you feel the need and can do so calmly - and by all means, report it if you suspect rules are being broken by the style of posting, because it is possible. That said, we do support those whose style is direct and won't ask them to change who they are. As far as emotional posters - while we do support and understand emotional posts, those posts are still expected to be respectful and follow rules.
Most importantly, we all need to remember (always) why YT is here.
YT was started with the intention of being a kind, fun, educational, supportive place for yorkie owners. It states very clearly in the
YT Rules and Guidelines what the expectations are in terms of how we should treat others -- and the overarching theme is that we be
respectful.
On that note and in closing, every single one of us should review the following pertinent YT Rules:
1. Please be civil and do not personally attack members, their opinions, their knowledge, or how they care for their dog. It is NOT acceptable to call any member a troll, a pot stirrer, or a bully. If you disagree with a member's post - you must reply respectfully; if unable to do so, you should not post. YT will not allow rude, snide, or disrespectful remarks towards fellow members. If you have only criticism and nothing constructive to add to a thread - then DO NOT POST. If you have ongoing conflict with a member, you may place them on your ignore list. It is not allowed to publicly declare whether a member is placed on 'ignore' - any posts stating such will be deleted and could result in consequences.
2. New members will be treated with respect, patience, and extra understanding. All yorkie owners at YT were “new” at some point; new members come to YT hoping to learn about their dogs and they want some support, patience and kindness while learning and sharing. If you are a member who cannot offer patience and understanding to new members or during sensitive topics, then you should not post on applicable threads. If you break this rule - your posts will be deleted, your access to the applicable section(s) may be removed for up to 30 days or indefinitely, and/or you will be suspended.
3. If your personal interactions are deemed problematic, attacking, badgering, snarky/snide or anything similar, (via forums, PMs, chat etc.), your account may be suspended for 1-4 weeks. If you try to circumvent this by creating another account, both accounts will be PERMANENTLY BANNED. For more serious offenses, you may be banned from YT immediately, rather than suspended. If a member causes ongoing problematic issues in a certain section of YT, we may disable the member's access to that section for 1-4 weeks; if it continues, access will be removed indefinitely.
Feel free to respond to this thread whether kind, direct, or emotional
. And if you have suggestions, feel free to share them.