I think too this is a lack of bonding issue. I had this with Peek a Boo. It took me 8 months to get inside his head, but only after I gave up trying and decided to accept him as he was. I thought maybe he was just too damaged to reach. But every night, I sat with him on my lap, and no matter what he had done that day, even if it was all wrong, I made a point to tell him what a good boy he was, and that I loved him. And I would kiss his cheeks... he would turn away and not ever look at me, but I kept trying. Never go to bed mad.
Then he started to turn his face for his kiss on the other cheek. I was sooo excited, I said okay, I'll give you as many kisses as you want! I think we stopped after at least ten! Soon after that, he finally licked my cheek... and I cried I was so happy. Also in the interim of all this, during the day I noticed slight improvements in his behavior.
He, too, used to potty outside then come in and potty more. Frustrated, I started watching him very closely. He'd go out, start to potty, then become distracted with things in the yard... a bird, a squirrel, whatever! Then he'd come in and finish his business.
I knew forcing my will on him wouldn't work, so I had to trick him. I'd let him back in and timed him to see when he had to go again, and started to take him out a second time. This worked bc coming back in was the trigger for him to relax, and in turn, he felt the need to go potty again. Very soon after that, he would come in, then go back to the door himself to be let out the 2nd time. After a while he was able to complete his task all in one outing.
In summary, work with what you have. Find the good things and praise that, ignore the bad and don't be mad... they are little mind readers. Make special time for him on your lap, maybe on the floor, or next to you on the couch, but make it okay. 30 seconds is fine, do it and be happy... gradually extend the time in 10 second intervals... babysteps.
Be sure to say and I quote Barbara Woodhouse "What a Good Dog!" Something about saying 'What' grabs their attention and makes it even more special! And above all, be patient. |