I am so sorry and I know how you feel. Jada lost 3 last years dental and 6 this year
this years losses included one big molar and two pre-molars
My vet said it was nothing I was doing wrong and that Jada just has a tiny mouth and bad teeth. I will say that after her gums healed it has not affected her appetite or the way she eats.
I did run her kibble through the food processor and add warm water for the first 4 days.