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Old 01-12-2013, 08:48 AM   #3
yorkietalkjilly
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Location: D/FW, Texas
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It's a long post to read but I have used this technique so successfully on my dogs and rescues. It was originally posted about an adult male dog but could be adapted to a younger dog. Sorry that in the copying & pasting some words may have run together. You are welcome to read it, adapt all or some of it and see if that will work for you.


SEPARATION ANXIETY:

Most anxious dogs that aren't used to it get nervous and anxious when their owners leave the home. First, take all emotion out of your leaving. Do not feel sad for him or tell him goodbye - just like pack leaders in the wild don't when they decide to go on a hunt or take a walk - they just walk away and nobody freaks. They are impersonal and matter-of-fact in how and what they must do. So no emotional goodbyes or hello's when leaving or arriving home. Act like a pack leader. Your dog is a pack animal and is genetically in tune with a firm but fair leader who comes and goes at will as necessary without fanfare or goodbyes.

As far as your actual leaving, just slowly desensitize him to your leaving and soon he will come to accept it. But you must desensitize him to it slowly and allow him to adjust to each step. Be patient with that baby - his anxiety can be overcome with time and patience and knowing what to do. Keep your training sessions short and impersonal,matter-of-fact in your attitude rather than uptight and worried. So relax before each session with a deep breath and calming of yourself. Give him a lovely food-stuffed kong toy, sit down and watch him playing with it, take up your keys and purse and whatever else you gather as if to leave home and sit back down and just watch him. Don't go anywhere. Just sit there ignoring him. Ater a while go, put your keys, purse, phone away, and call him to you for a hug, reward and play session. Now this is key: keep repeating this for a day or two on a weekend over and over in short sessions of 3 times giving the kong, getting your things together and just sitting there, then rewarding him. Occasionally give him different things to chew on or play with as you get ready to go but don't. Use old socks, empty plastic cola bottles, anything they like.

After a day or two of this, when he's playing with his kong and has accepted your getting your things together, get your keys/purse, watch him for a while then get up and without saying one word to him or looking in his direction, just like an alpha wolf who acts in its pack without question from one of his pack members,walk out of your door and stay outside. Shut the door. Stand there 10 seconds and walk back in, DO NOT NOTICE HIM AT ALL, no matter how he's dancing around your feet or whining in joy from the crate or pen, put your things away and sit back down where you usually sit when you watch him with his kong toy. I would sit there long enough to let him calm down a bit but that is up to you. Now you can say, "Good boy" or whatever verbal praise you want, reward him with a treat, a big, loving play session and lots of loving hugs, kisses. Repeat this over & over in short sessions throughout the weekend or day and keep increasing your times outside to let him learn slowly that though momma goes out of the door, she will be back and I'm really okay. Slowly but surely as you stay out longer and longer but do come back in, he'll have grown to accept this action as inconsequential in his life and soon grow to accept your leaving without thinking a thing of it - he'll know he gets a good thing to play with and some good food, momma will be back, then we can greet and kiss and he'll accept it.

Before long, as he grows secure in the knowledge that you return, he will just accept your leaving without any toys or kongs or anything. After a while, include getting in the car in this training exercise,even starting it up and getting right back out and coming in the house without noticing him, put your things away, sit on the couch, read some mail and then greet, treat, loving hugs, play reward. Repeat repeat repeat - sitting in the car a while with it running, letting him hear that noise outside. Eventually, drive around the block and then right back home, come inside matter-of-factly, not noticing your dog and putting your things away, coming to sit in the same place on the couch where you always sit during this training. Once you have sat there a while after each training session, now it is time to play and reward that anxious baby who is learning to be a goooood dog. So now have a blast with him. Lots of love, hugs, kisses, tugowar, etc. Happy, happy rewards for his efforts are definitely in order! He's worked hard to try to understand, accept and adjust, control himself.

If you are patient enough to do this, it works EVERY SINGLE time and turns an anxious, crying dog into one that accepts leaving as just a part of his day, quite secure mommie or daddy will be back. In time, dogs soon learn to adjust their day to mostly sleep while we are away and thus be ready to go when we get home.

I would also start him on a good positive-rewards training program such as in Tamar Geller's The Loved Dog book. This will teach him to bond well with you as you develop a strong relationship that he will not question, no matter what as he knows momma is always gonna keep it fun, loving and always rewarding for him. Keeping calm, unemotional and upbeat during training makes it less stressful for the dog and the fun of learning and making you happy are great rewards to him.
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Jeanie and Tibbe
One must do the best one can. You may get some marks for a very imperfect answer: you will certainly get none for leaving the question alone. C. S. Lewis

Last edited by yorkietalkjilly; 01-12-2013 at 08:49 AM.
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