We don't do much on gifts any more either. I buy for my kids, my parents, and my one remaining grandmother. I always try to get items they need. Most of the time they let me know ahead of time. My 15 year old wants money. I guess he thinks mom can't pick out clothes and stuff for him.
As far as my DH, he tried one year. It didn't work out to well.
So we usually get something the other one has already picked out.