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Originally Posted by RachelandSadie  i could go on all day about terrible parenting. i grew up with parents that never spanked us in public, but they gave that look and you knew u were in for it and shut up right away. i'm personally ok with spanking. i don't think you should beat the child to death or anything, but a swat or light pop on the butt when they're little is more of a startle factor that hurting them. it's teaching them to stop what they are doing right away. i believe spanking only works for so long and then kids are too old for it and need other forms of discipline like grounding, having things they want to do taken from them and other things like that. i hope to be a good balance of old styles of spanking and more modern ideas of reason and logic with my kids. i think i'll do ok and learn what works best for my little one and what won't work. |
In my opinion, spanking a child ('lightly' or otherwise) only teaches a child that the answer to 'unacceptable' behavior should be met w/ some kind of physical violence. So in essence, it just teaches them to hit in turn. Also, whatever emotion or tantrum is occurring never gets resolved bc you've 'startled' them out of it, and that results in future repression of emotions. Yes kids have tantrums, but to match crazy behavior w/ hitting/swatting/popping is not the answer.
Take something away from them that is a privilege, but don't take away their feeling of physical safety in their family. And that's not something I'm repeating from some textbook (altho it says it there too) - I know this from experience.
Hitting - lightly, moderately, or severely
is still hitting - no matter how anyone tries to position it. I would never hit anyone (and never have) unless they were fatally attacking my family, my pets, another human being, or another animal.