Thought this was a good article.
Mamas, Don’t Let Your Babies Get “Magnetized” to Dogs Dogs and Babies…Learning to Live Happily Ever After
I use the term, “magnetized,” to refer to how babies end up where they CANNOT stay away from dogs. I’m sure you’ve seen it — the kids who make a beeline for dogs in the park or who are always messing with their own dog or wanting to pet other people’s dogs. I discussed some of this in a previous post about
babies that “love” dogs. The main issue is the lack of self-control inherent in a magnetized young child. If a toddler or preschooler could turn it on and off,
maybe, but reliable on/off switches are not what toddlerhood is all about.
Is it Really That Big of a Deal?
Yes. I think this is a huge deal. Not everyone agrees with me so you’ll have to think it through yourself and decide how much risk you are willing to have your child assume. A majority of bites happen in response to a child approaching a dog. Young children have zero judgment. If you encourage your baby/toddler to go up to some dogs, he or she will likely want to go up to all dogs – whether or not you’re there to supervise.
It’s tempting to think,
“Well, I’m a good parent and I’ll be able to teach the difference to my child. Besides, I’m going to raise my child to be gentle and respectful with animals so she’s not likely to get bitten.” Maybe you’re right. Lots of times nothing bad happens. But lots of people drive drunk, too, and never kill anyone. Doesn’t make it a good choice.
And that’s what this is – a choice. As a parent, you get to
choose for your baby the habits and behaviors you are going to instill long before your baby can make her own choices. That’s a responsibility I don’t take lightly.
In my experience, encouraging a baby to notice, reach for and touch your dog (or any dog) opens the door to all the other variations a child will come up with through the toddler/preschool years. Kids aren’t really known for doing the right things at this stage of development. If you establish the dog within the circle of your baby’s interactions, the dog will be included in the whole range of physical expressions, not just the “nice” ones, but also the tantrums, experimentation, showing off for friends, etc.
Consider this:
“I have a normally very sweet, laid back 13 month old son named Joseph (changed name) who just discovered that smacking is fun two days ago. Ah, the joys of toddlerhood! He will pick up a toy (such as a truck) and smack our dogs on the head with it or just pound on them with his hands. He will try to smack at his dad or me too, but not as often. I am extremely lucky to have very tolerant dogs so far! This is what I have learned: telling Joseph “no!” just stops him for a second, and then he continues to try to hit the dogs. I have also tried blocking him when I see he is headed towards a dog and distracting him with a book or a toy. The distraction seems to work, but then he will crawl towards the dogs to smack them later.”
This is a classic scenario of a magnetized child. It all seemed “fine” when the baby feeling like being gentle. It’s hard to factor in the unintended consequence for later…when the baby is NOT feeling like being gentle. Joseph is not a “bad baby” — this is entirely normal. However, if he were not already “magnetized” to the dogs, he’s more likely to restrict his smacking to Mom and Dad and leave the dogs out of it.
Besides, even if your child doesn’t get as much into the smacking stage and your dog is endlessly tolerant, you still cannot escape
The Curse of a Good Dog and the fact that encouraging this magnetized behavior puts your child at a greater risk of a bite when the good dog has a bad day or your child is too forward with someone else’s dog who DOES object.
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Mamas, Don’t Let Your Babies Get “Magnetized” to Dogs Dogs and Babies…Learning to Live Happily Ever After