Oh boy, have you hit a nerve with me. I have 2 terrific adults, one is 30 and the other is 27. The best thing that ever happened was my attending a seminar called the 10 points of discipline when my oldest was in preschool. I thought it would be all about spanking etc. It wasn't, it was about how not to have to discipline your kids. I am so thankful that I listened and learned. The most important point was, once you say no, never change your mind. You can think about it before you commit, but never ever say yes, once you have said no. I have so many times heard kids argue with their parents and on the 5th time, the parent gives in. My kids never argued because they knew there was no point. Every child has something that is important to them, whether it is TV, computer or cell phone. You don't need to hit. If they go against the rules, take the important thing away. If you have to take everything away and leave them nothing but a mattress in their room, do it. Would you rather be the parent of a child that is socially successful or the friend of a drug addict or teenager who is pregnant? Set rules and your kids will follow them if you enforce them the first time, not the third. Set high expectation and they will meet them if you are there to help them succeed. I love my kids dearly and made them the most important thing in my life. |