Polinka is gone to Rainbow bridge this morning.
She was in treatment since last May, with relapses on August 1, December 1, and January 6.
I tried my best for her, all my life was all about her, 24/7, I don't even remember when I slept normally.
I went through alot of mental pressure too:
Some people let me know that I should put her down, because she was suffering (which was not true: she had pretty much comfortable life even being blind, except when she had relapses and those were gone in 1-2 days because of treatment).
Another group of people made me feel in the very beginning that I am not good enough and felt sorry for my dog because I was not following so-called best neurologist's treatment.
I started treatment that most of neurologists recommend.
Since August 1, when I already knew about Dr Sisson, I required from my neurologist to follow Dr. Sisson treatment.
I had a hope, but when Polinka had a relapse on December, 1, I lost my hope. Not because I am pessimist, it is just hard true and reality. This is very horrible disease I didn't want to believe my girl will die soon, I still wanted my girl live. All I wanted - Polinka's life WITHOUT suffering.
However, she started to be in pain in December because of her liver, and this was the very first time when I spoke with neurologist about hard decision.
He told me: it is too early give up. But he also mentioned that 98% owners don't give this chance to their dogs, that Polinka in best hands, but... if I decide to put her down, he will not be against. We decided to give her one more chance. After some tests and X-Ray, her treatment was changed for her comfort.
Last weeks she was happy girl, but honestly, I knew she will not stay long. I don't khow how explain it, I just know my girl, I know every single sign of this disease....Last night she complitely lost control of her body, collapsing, disorientation, she had eating problems, she was in head pain, and the highest pred dose she has ever had didn't help her.....
I wanted to go go to emergency same night, but Polinka got to sleep finally, so I waited until morning.... It was very fast......
Her last minutes she spent on my hands...
I wish no one from you will have same experience.
Sorry, I am not an active member on this forum, so might be not answer soon.... |