[Ringo1]

Originally Posted by gemy

That is exceedingly worrisome. My husband and I have talked about this. We will need to come up with some creative solutions soon. Many couples elected or just didn't have children, so that is not an option.

But even with children, it is very hard to care for someone with dementia. Eventually impossible in the home environment. I can't tell you the number of phone calls I got and had to leave work to find my Dad, who was out wandering. I tried putting an alarm on the doors, but Mom would turn it off, because the noise bothered her, then out the door Dad would go. In fact it was that wandering that eventually forced my hand to put Dad in a home. I still remember vividly one Jan evening at midnight, a knocking of the front door, I hurriedly put on housecoat to find my Dad in summer pj's and slippers and two policeman asking me if I knew this man. It must have been -10 degrees out there. I then slept in the living room, until Dad went into his nursing home.
The next day I called our social services, and the lady there was wonderful. She said she'd tried to swing some things, to get Dad in a nursing home ASAP. If she had put him on an emergency coding, he could have gone anywhere in the province; ie 100's of miles away. She was as good as her word, one week later I was moving Dad into the home.

Oh, I have no illusions that my son will be taking care of me in my old age! I really think I would rather be in a nursing home than have my son take care of me.

Of course, I say that NOW . . . . .