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Originally Posted by kdreamson  No you do not need to put your foot down! I say this from experience...i have been married for 26 years and when i was first engaged i got into a spat with my future sister in law about some trivial thing. This incident really upset me and for years afterward we just avoided each other. It was really uncomfortable and weird! Looking back now i cannot belive how it affected all family holidays and events! It was just not worth all the drama. If you expect to have a future with this man(and like it or not)his family, imo and from my own experience, You really need to make the effort to smooth this over. Even if you know in your heart that you are right! It' hard i know! In-laws do not go away!(no matter how hard we wish they would!!!) Just let it go. It is just not worth it!  |
I have to agree with this. I'm in a similar place with you OP. Been dating my fella for almost 5 years (will be 5 yrs Jan 23rd) and for the life of me I AVOID his family. It's sad and pathetic in my opinion. At first, I started avoiding them because they made me feel weird whenever I would visit, and it's to the point that I just don't want to go to their house at all, even if it's just to spend time with BF. I just don't want to do it. Now, I'm seriously considering a future with this guy, and I do mean marriage, house, white picket fence, and (biting my tongue) even kids. What sad existence will it be to spend all sorts of holidays isolated in a corner because of something so small? (for the record, I'm calling myself sad and pathetic, not you)
I say you should continue to be the bigger person. Tell your SIL that you had a bad day, and that you're sorry you couldn't return her call. If she's still a total witch about it, give it time, and I bet it will blow over.