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boopster · 10-02-2010, 07:57 PM

Cast:

Me - A computer professional with 30+ years of experience
Him - A retired significant other who has burned a few CDs using iTunes and who uses the word "download" for every activity that can be done with a computer
Steve Jobs - the villain who is responsible for iTunes

Him: "Can I cut the junk off the front of this song and burn it to a CD?"
Me: "Sure - but not in iTunes and I can't tell you the steps sight unseen. Why don't I sit down and do it for you."
Insert 15 minutes of debate about what constitutes junk.
Me: "OK, it's done."
Him: "Can we burn the whole thing to a CD now?"
Me: "Do you mean the whole unedited song or the edited version we just made?"
Him: "There's more than one version?"
Me: "Yes. There's the unedited original and the one I edited 20 seconds out of."
Insert 15 more minutes of back and forth about versions.
Me: "LOOK.... there are now TWO versions of the song. The original complete song and the one I edited 20 seconds out of!!!!!"
Him: OH... there are TWO versions! WHY DIDN'T YOU TELL ME?"
Me: I'VE BEEN TELLING YOU FOR THE LAST FIFTEEN MINUTES"
Him: "You know, getting information out of you is like pulling teeth."
Me: "No - I think sometimes we're speaking two different languages."
Him: "NO - YOU JUST DON'T GIVE ME THE INFORMATION I NEED TO MAKE DECISIONS."
Me: Grinding teeth
Him: I want two CDs. One with the whole song and one with the shortened version.
Insert 5 minutes of me muttering while burning said CDs.
Me: "OK - this one has the whole song."
Him: Leaves the room and comes back empty-handed.
Me: "And this one is the edited version."
Him: Leaves the room and comes back with both discs, unmarked.
Him: "Now which one is the shortened version?"
Insert 5 more minutes of debate during which "me" takes both discs, listens to them and hands one back.
Me: "This one is the entire original song."
Him: "OK - I'll just go use the CD player and figure it out for myself."

Moral of this play - if your S.O. is not a computer user, don't let him think it's used for anything beside sending email and playing Farmville. On second thought, Facebook is probably too much of a reach. Just unplug the dang thing and tell him it's broken.

BTW - Steve Jobs does not appear in the actual play, but I blame him for the whole mess.

10-02-2010, 07:57 PM	#1
boopster Donating Senior Yorkie Talker Join Date: Sep 2010 Location: Southern California, USA Posts: 1,643 Blog Entries: 1	Men! A Comedy in Many Acts Cast: Me - A computer professional with 30+ years of experience Him - A retired significant other who has burned a few CDs using iTunes and who uses the word "download" for every activity that can be done with a computer Steve Jobs - the villain who is responsible for iTunes Him: "Can I cut the junk off the front of this song and burn it to a CD?" Me: "Sure - but not in iTunes and I can't tell you the steps sight unseen. Why don't I sit down and do it for you." Insert 15 minutes of debate about what constitutes junk. Me: "OK, it's done." Him: "Can we burn the whole thing to a CD now?" Me: "Do you mean the whole unedited song or the edited version we just made?" Him: "There's more than one version?" Me: "Yes. There's the unedited original and the one I edited 20 seconds out of." Insert 15 more minutes of back and forth about versions. Me: "LOOK.... there are now TWO versions of the song. The original complete song and the one I edited 20 seconds out of!!!!!" Him: OH... there are TWO versions! WHY DIDN'T YOU TELL ME?" Me: I'VE BEEN TELLING YOU FOR THE LAST FIFTEEN MINUTES" Him: "You know, getting information out of you is like pulling teeth." Me: "No - I think sometimes we're speaking two different languages." Him: "NO - YOU JUST DON'T GIVE ME THE INFORMATION I NEED TO MAKE DECISIONS." Me: Grinding teeth Him: I want two CDs. One with the whole song and one with the shortened version. Insert 5 minutes of me muttering while burning said CDs. Me: "OK - this one has the whole song." Him: Leaves the room and comes back empty-handed. Me: "And this one is the edited version." Him: Leaves the room and comes back with both discs, unmarked. Him: "Now which one is the shortened version?" Insert 5 more minutes of debate during which "me" takes both discs, listens to them and hands one back. Me: "This one is the entire original song." Him: "OK - I'll just go use the CD player and figure it out for myself." Moral of this play - if your S.O. is not a computer user, don't let him think it's used for anything beside sending email and playing Farmville. On second thought, Facebook is probably too much of a reach. Just unplug the dang thing and tell him it's broken. BTW - Steve Jobs does not appear in the actual play, but I blame him for the whole mess.