Boy do I understand how you feel. My Bayleigh hates to drive anywhere. I actually walked her to our last vet apt (very close to the house). By the time we got there, she was running a fever. I felt so bad, but it was not different than driving her. She hates walks or anything out of the house. I hate it. If I force her to be in a car she will poop and throw up everywhere. I have tried crates, seats, everything and nothing works. I feel so bad because I have no other choice than to leave her behind.
Good luck. I hope your situation gets better.