[Wylie's Mom]

How Will I Know When It's Time?

Knowing that it is time is based on several notions:

1) What do others say - friends are all too often the first to say its time let go - but do they really know your pet? What does your veterinarian say? Sometimes it is important for you to remove yourself from the situation and look at it from the outside - friends and the Vet can help you do that.

2) In many cases a pet is suffering if it can not keep up with the usual family activities. They watch you come and go with an ache in their heart that says, "I wish I can go with you but I can't - it is just too painful or I am too weak". You will feel guilty when you leave, but are you leaving an animal to suffer?

3) Try to compare the healthy individual to the current individual. What behavior is different and why is it different?

4) Are you getting frustrated with the care of your pet - does your pet cower or act as though it did something wrong when you clean or medicate him? Do you think this care is a burden and that it causes you stress? Just know that your pet is very aware of all of your emotions.

5) A pet will thank you for needed care with a lick or a tail wag - how does your pet react?

6) It is a rare dog or cat that actually lives to the point of senility - where they circle restlessly and then stand with their head in a corner or get stuck somewhere between furniture. A pet that is "no longer there" or exhibiting in and out consciousness and wandering or staring blankly is a much more comfortable decision of euthanasia than having to euthanize a pet that is fully aware. However - this wandering is often an attempt of a pet to hide from or somehow escape from intractable, intense and inescapable...pain. They simply cannot get comfortable lying there so they wander. That is a horrible realization that only few have true empathy for. Is your pet painful?

7) There is a worse grief that occurs long afterwards in cases where a pet is allowed to go for too long - it is a realization a month or so afterwards that you let it go too far. You are then forever burdened with that realization. Whenever you remember that pet or view an old photo - your heart will sink with not just sadness but also with the guilt that you might have let a pet suffer for your own sake. Try to imagine if you will feel this guilt afterwards.

Euthanasia is a mature responsibility. It is a loving gift and a noble sacrifice. When you love a thing - let it go. Do not try to control what is not yours to control. Freedom is the goal and nature is the most free of all but it is also the most cruel. Make a decision based on your unbiased sense of compassion and empathy - ignore anything selfish or you might regret it later. You will never be better off without your beloved pet, but will your pet be? JCC,DVM